Gifts That Make Room

I was just an ordinary 30-something year woman struggling with thoughts of how I wasn't good enough, smart enough, beautiful enough, thin enough, or worthy enough whenever I considered doing anything new. My life was filled with trepidation like performance anxiety, not being able to share simple ideas during business meetings and breaking into a cold sweat when I had to do a presentation. Worse yet was witnessing others use ideas I had privately shared for their own advancement but not being brave enough to speak up. Anxiety, fear and frustration was so overwhelming, it was deafening at times. I know first hand how it feels to have a great mind but be paralyzed by the pressure of a spotlight. I know how terribly difficult it is to function in everyday activities while bearing the burden of that fear. As I grew tired of mistreating myself, my life was gradually reshaped by a journey of self-discovery. I learned things about myself like why I had certain reactions and why I shied away from attention. Once I decided that that was no way to live, I began to stand up a bit taller and step forward just a half step more. I accepted internally that I matter and have something that people need to hear. Most of all that, I accepted that I could actually do the things I was afraid to do. This is a brief recounting of how the simple desire to understand my gifts led me on a journey to healing and success. I share my story with you with the hope and prayer that it will bless you to find your own healing and allow your gifts to make room for you.